Hostages is like Gilligan's Island stuck in the world of 24. Why Gilligan's Island you might ask? Because nothing makes sense and the more you ask questions, the more ridiculous the entire show becomes.
Gilligan's Island had the nonsensical questions like "Why would the Howell's bring so much money on a three hour tour?", "Why did Ginger bring her entire wardrobe?", "If so many random people were able to find this island and get back home, why couldn't anyone else? Or why didn't the castaways just leave and hope to be saved like the rest of their visitors?" The beauty to Gilligan's Island though was that questions like that were okay. The show was ridiculous but that's what made it lovable.
Hostages, however, lacks the charm and goofiness that Gilligan's Island had. And it's an action drama, so I'm not saying that it should have those things. It really shouldn't. Unfortunately, the ludicrous situations just keep on happening.
Where do I start? Here are my list of questions:
- Why are the writers determined to make Agent Duncan Carlisle seem like he's doing this for a good reason? In my book, if you take an innocent family hostage, you are in no way a good person.
- Why are the writers determined to make any of these kidnappers seem like good people? What is with all of the "He's a good guy" discussions??
- If they aren't watching Dr. Ellen Sanders because, in their words, "they're not worried she'll try to run," then wouldn't that be a good reason for her to run? If she disappears, they no longer have a reason to hold her family hostage. If they can't contact her, what can they do?
- Why would Hilarie Burton's Samantha ever be attracted to Tate Donovan's Brian Sanders? I'm sorry but after her previous attractive TV boyfriends, Chad Michael Murray and Matt Bomer, it is literally torture on the eyes to see her with someone who looks far too old and not the slightest bit attractive.
- Who takes someone hostage and then brings them out and about to have an affair? And on top of that, send false text messages from the man to the woman saying he loves her? If they want things to not seem suspicious, wouldn't it be best to not have the guy sit there confused?
- Is there a reason the kidnappers want Jake to be in danger of being killed by his drug dealer friends? Wouldn't him getting killed make them lose some of their edge?
- Why did Duncan help cover up Morgan's pregnancy? Why would he care?
- Why didn't Ellen just kidnap Duncan's daughter and hold her until her family was released?
- Why hasn't Ellen gone searching at the hospital for his wife yet? I don't think she's thinking about leverage.
The ultimate questions I have about the show, though, are these: Why did the creators think this was a sustainable plot for an entire series? Wouldn't it have just worked better as a movie?
And my final question for all of those watching it: The show has awful ratings so what do you think will run out first? The show or the plot?
Watch Hostages on CBS tonight if you are easily entertained by ridiculous plots like I am.